Marriage? Are you Ready!?

The other day I got a random phone call from my one of my best friends from high school. She had gone out to dinner with her dad and his real estate agents. Their son showed up for dinner and he was semi-tall, dark, handsome, and funny. Melissa said that the whole time they were eating she kept thinking how perfect we would be together. Then near the end of the meal her dad said, “So Melissa has this friend…” and commenced to ask if he would like to go out on a blind date with me. He said, “Well I would be up for it but let me give you my number so that she can call me if she wants to.” My friend made it sound all too perfect and meant to be. She ended by saying, “Remember Doree. I have never set you up with anyone before and I would never set you up with someone I wouldn’t go out with myself.” (Too bad she’s married.) We went to lunch the next week and she handed me the phone number reminding me of this very important thing. She wanted me to call him.

Of course I was not going to! I took the number put it in my phone and threw the paper away. I thought, “Maybe if we have a party I will mass text everyone including him but I am not going to call him.” The following week I get out of class and check my phone. I had a missed call. From Juan Pedro! (His parents are from Mexico but he was born in the US.) I called my friend and said, “What is going on!?” She explained that he had called her stepmom and asked for her number then called her to get my number. Anyways he called again. I answered and talked to him. He was fun to talk to on the phone. He was really nice and every time we talked, we talked for like an hour.

So after going through our schedule’s we set up a day. Afterwards he asked if I could drive. “What!?” You don’t do that after setting up the date! I couldn’t because my car was in the shop. So I told him that. He told me that he couldn’t drive because he didn’t have a car. I was like, “Well do you have anyone that we could double with!? You could bring a friend and I could bring a friend?” He said he would see. I got one of my friends to agree and next time I talked to him I told him. He said, “Um, well I really like talking to you and I would like to get to know you one on one. So if it’s alright let’s go out just the two of us this time and then next time we will double and your friend can come.” He said, “You can drive my parents car.” I was like, “What!? You told me that you don’t have a car so why don’t you just drive your parents car?” He said, well I didn’t want to tell you this but I have gotten a few speeding tickets that I forgot to take care of so my license is suspended.” I was like, “Um. Okay.” He said, “But I really am responsible…” and went into a story of why he had forgotten. So it was me driving no matter what. His parent’s car or me finding one. I said I will call my sister and see if I can drive her car. She agreed. I started thinking and decided this could be a potentially awkward situation, me picking him up!? Would I honk? Walk up to the door? Have to meet his parents? He had mentioned that he worked at the Gap which was just down the street from my house so I asked him if he could just have a friend drop him off at my apartment. He said, “Okay.” So we were set. The date was on.

That night I got ready and around 6:00 he arrived. I opened the door and he just walked right on in the house. He said, “Hey! You’re Doree, great I am Juan.” He walked right past me and over to the kitchen and around the living room. I was just standing by the door kinda in complete shock of his forwardness. I introduced him to my roommates and he realized I was still standing by the door. He said, “Oh you are ready to bounce!? Okay, let’s bounce then!” Yes, I thought. Let us “bounce.” We got into my sister’s car and he said, “I wanted to ask you this inside but can I give you a hug?” I was like, “uh… sure.” So we awkwardly leaned over the mid section of the car and did some sort of a side hug. Then we sat there. I don’t know if he thought I knew where to go but I had to say, “Um… so where we headed?” He said, “Oh! Well, this is what I had in mind. What if we go to the grocery store, pick up some stuff for fruit smoothies and get a pizza and go back to my house and make the smoothies.” I was like, “Okay. So where should I drive to first!?” He said, “Well I don’t want to seem cheap but I was thinking Little Ceasar’s since they have the $5 pizza’s so they are kinda cheap.” I thought, “Well I didn’t think that until you said that!” So we went to Little Ceasar’s and he ordered the $5 cheese pizza. To his complement he did open all the doors for me.

After getting the pizza he was like, “Oh!... maybe we should have gone to the grocery store first. Otherwise the pizza will get cold… Well do you just want to drive to my house and then go back to the grocery store to get the smoothie stuff?” I was like, “sure.” Not knowing his house was like 20 minutes away!

We decorated the pizza with mushrooms and then heated it up again in the oven. He started to tell me things that I typically wouldn’t tell people on the first date. I was like, “Um, do you always tell people stuff like this the first time you meet them?” He said, “No. I just feel like there is something special about you, like I can tell you this.” He continued, “And Doree. I just want you to know that I will never lie to you.” I said, “Um… you kinda already have. What about the whole you can’t drive cuz you don’t have a car going to um, I can’t drive because of my speeding tickets…” He said, “Well I won’t lie to you and I just want to tell you the truth.” So he told commenced to tell me a whole different story. In this one he was going to school in at a southern state university. On his way home one weekend he jumped the railing on the freeway and barreled down a hill. He said that the reason that he couldn’t drive is because he was 45% (or something) blind in one eye because of the accident. I was like, “okay.” (whatever by now, right!?)

After dinner he asked what I wanted to do next. Go to a movie? Go play pool? Or Make smoothies? I said, “Well I don’t really like movies. I don’t know how to play pool so that won’t be fun and I am kinda full so I don’t really want a smoothie.” (Well options are up – time to go home.) He said, “Okay, that’s a good idea, let’s just sit here and talk. I’d really like to just get to know you more.” (ugh.) So we sat on his couches and talked. He asked me, “What are your ultimate dreams in life?” Um, a little deep right to start off the conversation. I think he could tell I was a little bewildered because then he said, “Ok, what do you want to be when you grow up?” I have this guy friend who I told I wanted like 12 children 6 natural and 6 adopted. He said, “Doree! Don’t ever tell any guy you are dating that otherwise he will NEVER get serious with you!” I was like, “Well, ultimately I want to be a mom, I’d like to have 12 kids… Have 6 and adopt 6.” He said, “I’ve never thought of that but I would totally do that. Ya, that would be awesome. I would so be open to that.” I was like, “oh… uh… ok… well I like to travel and go new places, recently I added Jerusalem to my top places I want to go.” He said, “Perfect my parents have a time share in Jerusalem we could totally go there for a week! And Doree, I would love to take you to Mexico and South America to take you on a tour there. It is so beautiful there, so spiritual, and I’d just love for you to see it.” I was like, “wait a minute, when did my Jerusalem trip turn into your Jerusalem trip!?” Blah! He said, “I have an idea! What do you say we go pray with people at the nursing home?” I’m like, “What!?” And he was like, “Ya. It’ll be fun.” So to make a long story short we went and prayed with people at a nursing home. On the way home we passed his church building and he said (as I am driving), “Doree. I’d like to ask you a question.” I was like, (in my mind NO!!!!), gulp, “okay!?” He said, “I’ve made a goal to make sure my wife and I go to the church once a week together and I think that goals are important to start before your married so I was just wondering if we could set a date and start going to church together to study once a week.” I said (being honest), “I can’t really set a date right now because I am busy and every week is different for me…” He kept asking until I finally confessed (because I didn’t want to lie) that Wednesdays and Thursdays are usually more open. But did NOT make any commitments.

When we got to his house I pulled up to the driveway and said, “Well thanks.” He said, “Is it okay if you get out of the car so I can give you a hug before you leave?” I was like, “ok.” So I got out but didn’t walk one foot. I stood right by the driver’s door. He came over and he gave me a big ol’ hug. I let go after one second but he kept holding on. As he was hugging me I heard him inhale and exhale very deeply in my ear. I was like, “What the!? What is he doing?!” It was more than his normal breathing and I think he was just trying to capture a smell to remember the evening. I backed away fast once I realized. He moved his arm from my back to my shoulder’s and then I didn’t know what was happening but he kissed my forehead and then slowly and romantically!? he moved his face in like he was going to give me a kiss on the lips. I immediately just put my head down so my chin was near my chest. He said, “I was just teasin. I wasn’t really going to give you a kiss. I just wanted to see what you would do.” I was like, “Ya. Right.”

I got into the car, said my good-bye’s and drove off, feeling like a wedding date had just been set for me that I never agreed to!

(Oh and don’t worry, the next morning he came into my work to see me. The good lady’s that I work with didn’t tell him I was in the back. Sad but don’t worry. I had “the talk” with him over the phone and told him that I thought he was great, just not the right time for me and that he had moved kinda fast. As soon as we hung up he sent me a text and told me he had decided to be a teacher, the career I told him I wanted my future husband to have. LOL. What do you say to that!? Congratulations! So it all got taken care of although the phone calls and texts didn’t end. If there is one thing I learned from this kid it is boldness and persistence have not died!)